Friday, August 28, 2009

A Child That Makes You Go, "Hmmm."

I have certain expectations from my children- having nurtured them for the first 5 years of life I believe it is perfectly acceptable, if not their responsibility, for them to be nervous when leaving home on their own for the first time. Especially if their only prior regular time away from me was a 1 hour twice a week preschool.



A few days before school started I realized that Joseph was probably a little frightened about attending kindergarten. (It didn't help that I accidentally mixed up the timing of the "Meet the Teacher" Day and arrived as everyone was leaving, so we never entered the building and he had never seen his teacher.) I asked him if he would like me to drive him the first day, wisely, I felt, emphasizing it would be a one time deal so he wouldn't come to expect it all the time. He told me in no uncertain terms that he was riding the bus and never wanted me to drive him. EVER.





Still, I knew that he must have some trepidation ... leaving home for the first time ... riding to school without any idea what to expect ... surrounded by complete strangers. So the next day I asked if he wanted me to follow behind the bus, to make sure he got to the right class. The thought of him exiting the bus so small and alone made my heart ache, while the "my mother is such a dork" look he shot me made my head ache. (Seriously, he should have to be at least 13 before he perfects that look. That's the 5th child for you.)




So the first day of school unfolded. I dispatched the first shift to ride the bus to middle school

and then, later, the second group to the elementary school.





A very long 4 hours later we headed outside to wait for the afternoon kindergarten bus. Actually I headed outside, Joseph and Matthew had been out there with Peter for a couple hours already. Being the first day, the bus was running late. So we waited, and waited, and waited. About 5 minutes into the wait Joseph turns to look at Peter and I, informing us that we can go inside, he's got this covered. Seriously? I'm sure he is just trying to cover for tummy butterflies, but he did sound pretty nonchalant. Not to mention, he rolled his eyes at us when we told him we preferred to wait.




Finally the bus turned the corner. Joseph stood up and calmly brushed the dust off himself. He waited for the doors to open as if it were an old routine, then he climbed inside and found a seat. Not a nervous twitch, a jittery tremble, or even subconscious tick. Peter and I waved as the bus pulled away from the curb, but Joseph didn't see. He didn't look back. Not even once.









*I apolgize for the quality of the photos. While my real camera is in the shop I am stuck with my first digital camera. All 4 megapixels of it. I did remember to eliminate the bus number from the side of the bus, though.*

27 comments:

  1. Wow, you are home with only Matthew during the day now! That is crazy. I can't believe that Joseph started school, but I can believe that he wasn't nervous. That is definately Joseph. I want to see closer pictures of the older kids. Did Elise cut her hair short?

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  2. Oh I get those nervous parental butterflies just thinking of it but it fills me with adrenaline and excitement too...it's just the beginning for these amazing kids...and even though it makes our motherly hearts ache a little, I love that he didn't even look back.
    And I love the first morning beach pictures...I suppose it would be a little far for us to drive to get a couple of those, eh?

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  3. My mother says I did something similar. She took me to school (no bus, and there was no way she was letting me walk to school by myself at five). She says I just said "see you later" and walked right into school (I was an only).

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  4. Hmmm, something about this story really doesn't surprise me much! :-) Elise's outfit is soooo cute! I love so much that it is cool to wear skirts and look nice these days! Way cute.

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  5. My baby starts on Monday...I don't think she is quite that independent though.

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  6. In some ways it is sad that he walked away so easily, but in some ways it is easier to do it that way then to have him cling to your leg and scream he isn't going.

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  7. Kim~ That is so Joseph. I posted the pictures on Facebook for you. Elise did cut her hair a month back. Guess I should have posted pictured sooner.

    emma jo~ You could always get the kids up earlier to make the drive down and back before school. Why would you want them to have a good night's sleep before school? ;)

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  8. Felix&Ava~ I bet your mom was thrilled with you. I've always tried to encourage independence in my kids, but sometimes I'd like just a little bit of reliance on me.

    andrea~ That skirt was one of my favorite finds for school shopping (I bought all at the clothes at consignment stores this year). None of my kids have ever had a problem with going to school, but he was the first to not even show nervousness and my first to send on the bus the first day of kindergarten.

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  9. Cami~ I have two years before my baby leaves for school. I've yet to cry (or even feel like crying), but I wonder if I will the last time I do it.

    Mom at Our House~ I will pick the not looking back over the clinging ANY DAY. (Or at least I think I would, having never had the opportunity of having a child want to stay with me).

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  10. I have not had to put any kids on the bus yet but the bus does stop right in front of my house and I got a interesting show this week as I watched my neighbor have to force her kindergartner kicking and screaming onto the bus. Everyday.

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  11. Jeanette~ That would be awful. I'm lucky my kids haven't had that problem before. They are all jumping out of their pants excited about school every single year (I always loved school and somehow passed that gene on to my children).

    Thanks, by the way, for showing me the correct spelling of kindergartner. I couldn't get spell check to show it to me and I always wonder how I am misspelling it. Never thought to drop the extra 'e'.

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  12. We all know 5th children are the best. Sorry you did't get to use your motherly pampering more.

    At least now with just Mathew at home you might be able to keep a closer eye on him (riiiiight..., it won't mean more internet/reading, will it?)

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  13. Gordon~ I believe you are mistaken, it is obviously the oldest child that is the best. They joy of only one child at home is that it means more of all three of those things. (After 6 at home it is almost like adding extra hours to the day).

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  14. I couldn't even imagine sending Nathan away on the bus. I can't believe he is really in school. Nathan would be jealous though, he is under the impression that he is starting preschool and needs a new backpack, and that it will just be me and Ashton at home. I haven't broken his heart yet to explain that he is doing "home preschool" which really means we will read and color a little and learn a lot of useful information on PBS and at Walmart.

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  15. Brenda~ Your home preschool sounds just like mine. I did buy him and Matthew completely unnecessary lunch boxes. They love them.

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  16. Good to have this information - takes 5 children before you can perfect the "sending them off on the first day" dance and no one cries. Congrats on starting off another good year.

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  17. Claudia~ I can think I have it perfected, but I still have one more to test my abilities on (and I suspect he is the most likely to freak out on his first day).

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  18. I cannot believe Joey is starting school. I seems like yesterday that he was a newborn curling up to sleep in my arms.

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  20. He looks so grown up. It doesn't surprise me that he is so independant. I bet he does great in school. All the kids look so nice. They have changed alot since Christmas.

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  21. What a hoot! That's how my Emmy was with nursery...she doesn't miss me at all!

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  22. I am sending my boys off to 7th and 8th grade tomorrow. I was having a more difficult time getting them ready then they were.

    They grow too fast. And that first picture of your little guy is ADORABLE. He is a keeper.

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  23. Boyer family~ I was thinking he seemed so much younger than the other kids. Then I remembered he is younger than any of my other kids. He isn't even 5 yet.

    Tucker Mom~ I sometimes wish they were a little less independent (usually after finding another mess in the kitchen because someone else decided to make lunch without permission).

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  24. Shalise~ My kids were the same way in nursery. Never a single problem. Reading your blog, that doesn't surprise me in the least!

    Steph~ I sent 2 off to middle school, too. Much more scary than kindergarten.

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  25. When I read the comment that your kids are "jumping out of their pants" to start school, I had to wonder if they left said pants in NYC. :)

    I like the shift pictures. I wondered why you posed them on the beach and then realized how symbolic the pics are: leaving summer and moving ahead to school. Was that intentional? Very nice.

    I've always assumed my kids would do great with their first day at school, and they have. When Kent took them for their first day this year--including my a.m. Kindergartner--I headed over to a friend's house for a moms-only back-to-school celebration!

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  26. It's hard when they declare their independence - especially at 5!

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  27. Mary- I just posed them that way because I could. Although I like your arguments and might just pretend they are mine. I am thinking of doing a lunch group with all the other moms celebrating our new kid free status.

    ucmama- Better than deciding they're content with co-dependence, though. And he hasn't even turned 5 yet. He is still 4
    :(

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