Sunday, October 11, 2009

I Will Not Be Adopting Monkeys Anytime Soon

Sometimes I wonder if I'm normal.  OK, honestly I have no delusions of being normal, but I wonder just how odd I am.  The other day I watched a show called "My Monkey Baby."  It was about people who adopt monkeys and treat them as their children.  One of the reasons given was how much they missed feeling needed in the way only small baby or toddler needs.  The hunger for absolute dependency. 

Granted, my ideas of normal shouldn't be formed by people who get angry when their monkeys are referred to as monkeys, but, still, I have heard that sentiment before.  I wonder if I am alone in feeling relief as my children grow independent: when I put up my crib for the last time I was excited, I smile as I give away clothes finally too small for me to keep as hand-me-downs, I love sending my children to school and watching them perform tasks for themselves I once had to do.  As each stage ends I leave it behind without remorse, regret or longing.  Not that I didn't find joy in my toddlers, just that I am completely okay with being finished with that stage.  Granted, I have been dealing with the terrible twos for a dozen years, so I may be suffering from over kill.

Last week I had book club at my house and decided to attempt balancing out my fireplace with some pots.  It wasn't till after everything was in place that I realized I had reached yet another milestone.  The pots were on the floor.  After years of keeping everything higher than a toddler can reach (with or without a chair), I can finally use my floor space again.  It was a happy thought.

16 comments:

  1. It's not overkill - after a few diapers, we're all happy that potty training is around the corner somewhere. Actually, that is one of the main drawbacks of owning a dog - they never learn to flush.

    I love your display - in that "I totally envy you and can't find my car keys because I left them on the counter" way.

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  2. I honestly have mixed emotions about my kids growing older. I love all the milestones and take great pride in their independence. But I long for the wide eyed wonder of an infant and toddler.

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  3. I am with you all the way. I used to wish I could have frozen my youngest at age 2 1/2, but I so look forward to my older children being young adults. I know the teenage years hold a lot of dangers, but I'm excited to see the people my children are becoming. I can hold other peoples' babies and look at my children's scrapbooks, and while I love to remember the sweet things about those years, I honestly have no desire to prolong or go back to them. If we ever adopt, it will be a child who sleeps through the night and is potty trained; the older the better.

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  4. I really like the pots. Good job

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  5. You are NOT alone. I enjoyed my babies and toddlers but I seem to be wired to deal with children better than babies. The older my kids get, the more I am enjoying them.

    We recently had a little family vacation. My Hubs was basking in the glow of how much fun it was to just be with the kids (finally) without the stress the little ones bring. Then he had a brillant thought- "We should have another one!" he proclaimed. Uh. No! I totally would have done that 5 years ago but not NOW.

    Besides, the whole reason it was so much fun was because we DIDN'T have a baby. Sigh. So, if prefering older kids to babies makes you abnormal, I'm right there with you!

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  6. Claudia- Actually, that is most of the reason I don't want a pet. I don't in any way crave being thoroughly needed for everything.

    Steph- By the time my youngest is a tween I wonder if my opinions will have changed? By then I can look forward to grandchildren, though.

    Mary- Exactly! I think we are in the exact same place in mothering.

    Tucker Mom- Thanks, Mom.

    Cynthia- I am really surprised sometimes just how much I am enjoying not having a little one around. It was such a huge part of my life for so long, I am kind of shocked how little I miss it.

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  7. I can't wait for the day I can put pots on the floor and be able to use candles or other fragile things in my house!

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  8. I'm at the beginning of my motherhood journey...and I completly agree with you. People ask me if I miss the newborn time and are shocked when I say No. Granted my son is into everything right now, but I know that is leading to independence. :) Thank you for validating me.

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  9. I love independence. I can't wait for kids to crawl and walk and do things on their own. I'm totally with you on that! OH and your pots are so chic, I love them.

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  10. I really liked this post, especially since Andy are on the brink of deciding if we are 'done' or not. (We are like 99.9% sure). I do look forward to saying good-bye to diapers, cribs, and baby food for the last time. It will be nice to go somewhere and not have to be completely dependent on having that diaper bag.

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  11. Just the other day my husband and I were talking about how much we look forward to the day when we no longer have to haul a stroller around. I hate having baby stuff like swings and play mats all over my house. I always rejoice when they outgrow them even though (at least so far) I know it is only a matter of time before I have to pull them back out again.

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  12. Ummm, after 6 kids? I think you are allowed to feel relief when independence comes knocking.

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  13. I watched that too. I think the people who can't get on with their lives after babies are really the weird ones. I think a lot of women find their entire sense of self-worth on their sense of feeling needed by something helpless. Of course when all of our children have left the house, I'm sure we will have moments of nostalgia too. We will miss it, but I think I'll also be excited to start a new phase. My youngest is 4 and I LOVE being out of the baby stage and feeling like am a real human being again.

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  14. Oh how I envy your ability to decorate however you please!! Right now I have to be content with the fact that I don't need a dog because I still have a toddler that will eat whatever she finds on the floor...but I DO call my children monkeys anyways, is that wrong?

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  15. I have mixed feelings. I am sad to see my kids getting older, but I am so excited to see them go to the next stages in life and to realize one day I will be able to keep the books on the bookshelf and not have a curious 2 year old rip them off each day.

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  16. I am RIGHT THERE with you!

    I also really like not having child locks on the cabinets. And being able to communicate with little people without them crying in frustration because I don't understand them.

    Now if I can just get my husband to stop crying in frustration because I don't understand him, it will be perfect...

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