Apparently green life flourishes in my home. More specifically, in my fridge. Oh, and they're more fuzzy than leafy. Not always green, either, purple and gray also make an appearance (I like to practice diversity). There was a regular growth revolution going on when we came home from our week long vacation.
You may be scratching your head right now, wondering why I didn't clean out my fridge before the trip (or you may be gagging, in which case I am sorry. Also I am laughing at the thought of you gagging, and am sorry for that, too). Yes, I admit that some of the fuzzy fun was probably (definitely) already there, just waiting for a week of unmolested darkness to flourish. All I can say is that when I write about the dangers of unproductivity, I really mean it. Okay, fine. I didn't really write about the dangers of unproductivity. But I did THINK about it. Probably ... maybe.
But really, there is an upside to not cleaning out the fridge often enough. There is the whole How long can you hold your breath while looking in the fridge? thing. Also, the only way to keep a healthy gag reflex is to exercise it often, and I am all about living healthily. You can tell by the lettuce/fungi hybrids in my crisper.
Another upside? Guessing games keep the mind strong. Games like Name That Leftover! and When Did We Last Go To Chili's?, (a.k.a. How Long Has THAT Been In There?). If nothing else, there is the rigorous mathematical calculations involved in figuring out how long past expiration any given container is.
So Monday's first order of business was to, well, check my email. But the second one was definitely to, um, get on Twitter/Facebook. But I can absolutely promise "clean the fridge" was somewhere in the order of business. I didn't want, after all, a repeat of when we got home (at about 1 in the morning) when my husband nearly passed out from the noxious fumes while checking for BBQ sauce in the fridge door, or at least made a big stink about their nauseous nature (one big stink deserves another).
Anyway, I have now scrubbed, disinfected, and in every way cleaned out my fridge. I spent the afternoon periodically peeking inside to bask in it's shiny cleanness. I can't help but think, though, that the shelves are looking a little lonely in their emptiness. They need some leftovers to fill it out a bit. After all we are taught to develop our talents, and one of mine is a green thumb.
Next order of business? Clean out the freezer and make sure no one has stashed any dead bodies inside. I like to think of it as Name That Leftover! (Freezer Burn Edition). And of course by "next order of business" I mean to get to it before July. Probably ... maybe.
P.S. You can thank me for not taking a before picture. Or for not thinking of taking a before picture until it was too late. I prefer thanks in the form of cookies. Unless you're using ingredients from a fridge like mine, in which case I'll take cold hard cash.