Case in point:
A couple of weeks ago, my youngest wanted to go on a walk. Since my other kids were all planning on walking and/or riding around the block, I asked them to throw him in the wagon and take him along. "Just make sure you put some clothes on him," I warned (not that he is in a diaper a lot or anything). All was fine until they came back a few minutes later. This is how my children were dressed as they paraded around the neighbors homes with bikes, scooters, and wagons:
(This is the middle of summer when it is hot outside)
(this is what Ryan looked like 1.5 seconds after he came in the door. Lest you think he is normal, he was the one I asked to dress Frog Head)
Just in case you're not convinced yet:
Joseph met a neighbor boy only a few months older than himself. This is wonderful. I envisioned play dates and school buddies. But Joseph just envisioned walking over ALL THE TIME, BY HIMSELF wearing WHO KNOWS WHAT to ask if the child could play. Which is bad enough on its own, but he always had a diaper clad 2 year old shadow trailing behind him. I tried telling him no. I tried punishment. I tried locking the screen door.
But the other morning, as I was using the restroom, I heard the door shut. 8:30 in the morning, wearing PJ's, with a brother who was not changed and wearing only a diaper, my kid knocks on the that child's door. It took a couple of minutes to register that I heard the door shut, and a couple more to get decent. By the time I got out to get them (also still wearing PJ's and barefoot with bed head) the child was on the front lawn talking to them and the horrified father was looking on (this was about the 4th time it had happened).
Needless to say, I doubt that child will ever be allowed near our home. (And I made Joe cry by scaring him about all the evil strangers waiting to grab him and his brother. And I may have mentioned that anyone driving around could call the police and put him in jail, too. At least he hasn't gone out on his own again.)
So, because I so want to be Mother of the Year, I suggest we make some new categories (ones I am sure to win) like the following:
- Loudest yeller
- Best able to tune out crying and/or whining
- Biggest laundry pile
- Best able to allow children to express their creativity in clothing choices
- Best able to pretend you are fostering creativity in clothing choices when you really weren't paying attention
- Best able to "hold it" because you don't know what will happen if you take 2 minutes to use the bathroom
I expect a nomination any day now . . .