The 6th baby's vocabulary

Once upon a time, when my oldest was a sweet little baby and not a hormonal tween, I was walking with her in the foyer of our church. A stranger stopped and asked me if Elise was my first child. Perhaps he noticed that at 20 I looked 16 and was too young to have more than one. Maybe it was the fact that I was letting my months old baby "walk" by hunching over and holding her hands with my fingers. For whatever reason, when I beamingly told him, "Why yes it is!" he said, "I could tell." And his horrified wife whacked him in the shoulder as they walked away.

I was left scratching my head and wondering what that comment meant. But now I have 6 children. I know.

For instance, when Elise was a baby we listened in continuous rapture for those first words. "I think she just said Mom!" "Did hear that? That was definitely Dad" "Did she just said ball? I think she just said ball!!!"

And

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Then

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I

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Had

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Five

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More

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Children

You want to know what a 6th baby starts saying? Matthew's began talking more in phrases that slowly became intelligible. They included:

"My turn" ~ "Watch me" ~ "Look at me"

"He hurt me" ~ "Stop it" ~ "Don't" ~ "Mine"

And there is always this talking, caught on tape. Need I go on?


Apparently there is a difference between the 1st and last child. Of course his 4 year old brother's first word was "hotdog." Said in the checkout line at Sam's Club while pointing at the food court. But that is OK, because his next word was "chocolate." And after "popcorn" and "ice cream" he finally expanded out to "Mom" and "Dad."


Anyway, now that Matthew is better at talking, I am learning Matthew-ese. Here is what some things mean:


"Joseph did it" = I know what I did is wrong and I should be punished.


"He took it from me" = I want whatever my brother/sister has and am too weak to steal it myself.


"He hurt me" = I hit/kicked/punched my brother/sister trying to steal what they have and they retaliated.


"Watch out!" = I'm about to jump on you.


"Mommy, where are you?" = I think you're trying to sneak into the shower again. I will find you, strip, and give you a heart attack when I sneak into the stall behind you.


"Be fair." = Give it to me now.

This morning he had a new one. After telling his brother to share, he ran up to Joseph and said, "Mom said to!! Mom said!!" I don't think anyone would mistake Matthew for my first child. Even if they didn't hear him speak, they might notice the way he's dressed...